Our fellowship leaders had brought up a wrap up session about the series of the bible study. They gave us a few different sections to simulate us to think of the past we learned from the series of the bible study. In fact, I was amazed and lighted up by the section about the time management and how much time we spent with our god in any time. The chart I made it showed that I spent up to seventy percentages of time on my work since I started this new job. During that moment, I shocked and thought of myself as a work-alcoholic because I can believe a person who dislikes his work so much can work without rest. This should be ridiculous. After the church, I and a few brothers and sisters discussed about recent work and life. I realized that I was unconfident and unfaithfulness in many perspectives of life, especially of my career and my religious in the conversation. even though I was so depressed and unconfident, I was so glad that my brothers and sisters support me so much and give me so many suggestions to find a way to leave this dead end corner. To be honest, I should have a life transformation from the old living style to a new living style, so that I can gain more power from God. Since I have started this work, I felt like gaining less energy from God because I gave a bunches of excuses to abandon God. Like the bible what it said from Hebrews 10:24-25 "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another -- and all the more as you see the Day approaching." Now, I should not be giving up meeting together although I was. Therefore, I should establish brand new living style for giving myself to God.
In fact, I am staying in my comfort zone to keep complaining what I don't have now and too afraid of losing something what I have now but I should wake it up from this nightmare/comfort zone because we have nothing since we born, so I should not be afraid of this because I have "him" behind me to be my biggest supporter. I should keep running for life passionately for GOD and myself like what bible said from the Philippians 3:12-14.
"Dear God, please forgive what I did before in my work and what I did just now. I know I am a sinner and I offend you even I proclaim that I am a Christian, however I did so many thing which is against you and the law what you wrote on the bible. Now, I am praying for going back to you and gain the power from you. No matter what I encounter in the future I will still pray for you, even it is adversity or prosperity. God, please forgive me as being laziness to not pray for you so long. I love you Jesus and I love you to letting me to talk with you in this quiet time."
